Stranger Than Fiction

No Soundtrack

2011-12-29T02:27:00.000-05:00

You know what I noticed? Movies depend too much on their music to make the audience feel some sort of way. The director and sound people pick the right song to punctuate and accentuate a scene, and while it does the job right I can't help but feel manipulated.

I started a script a couple of years ago and instead of completing it I focused on what songs I'd get for each scene. Then it hit me- why can't I just write a strong enough script that doesn't need a soundtrack? Why depend on the music? The script, the acting and the directing should carry the film, not the tunes.

Instead of choosing more songs for a script that's not even finished, I think I'll make a playlist to help put me in the right mood for the movie, but leave it out during filming. What do you think- would you enjoy your favorite film if it didn't have a soundtrack? Can you even think of a recent/modern film without a prominent soundtrack, that blew your mind?

I gotta work on that in 2012.

Pastor Brown

2011-08-18T11:06:00.004-04:00

It has no release date (in theaters or on DVD) but I saw the trailer for the film "Pastor Brown" and what can I say? I want to see it.

Yes, it looks predictable and cheesy, and that fool Creflo Dollar is in it, but last year I saw the film "I Will Follow" also starring Salli Richardson-Whitfield (you can read my review here) and I'm kinda starting to feel her as an actress.

Hopefully I'll be able to see this film one day...if they ever release it... If you have any updates on this project, please, let me know!

Album Shout Out: Maroon 5's "Hands All Over"

2011-07-26T01:18:00.003-04:00

I'm pretty late on the scene with this CD, but what better way to dust off this ol' blog than with an album you can play from beginning to end without skipping one track? It's a rare artist that can accomplish this feat!

Here are some of my favorites:

It has such a dance-y, fun vibe to it; very reminiscent of disco. Yes, DISCO. I don't care if that makes me seem old and/or it turns you off, but many of these songs make me want to put on some roller skates and rolllllllll to the beat.

I love this CD so much I'm BUYING it and adding it to my "Cheer The Fuck Up" playlist.

You should do the same.

Lyrics To Love: The Fear By Lily Allen

2011-03-04T11:22:00.004-05:00

I want to be rich and I want lots of money
I don't care about clever I don't care about funny
I want loads of clothes and fuckloads of diamonds
I heard people die while they are trying to find them

And I'll take my clothes off and it will be shameless
'Cuz everyone knows that's how you get famous
I'll look at the sun and I'll look in the mirror
I'm on the right track, yeah I'm on to a winner

[Chorus]
I don't know what's right and what's real anymore
And I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore
And when do you think it will all become clear?
'Cuz I'm being taken over by the Fear

Life's about film stars and less about mothers
It's all about fast cars and cussing each other
But it doesn't matter cause I'm packing plastic
And that's what makes my life so fucking fantastic

And I am a weapon of massive consumption
And its not my fault it's how I'm programmed to function
I'll look at the sun and I'll look in the mirror
I'm on the right track, yeah we're on to a winner

[Chorus]

Forget about guns and forget ammunition
'Cuz I'm killing them all on my own little mission
Now I'm not a saint but I'm not a sinner
Now everything is cool as long as I'm getting thinner

[Chorus]
------

An "oldie" but goodie. Her cheekiness is what makes me love her so.

Music This Brooklyn-ite Can Appreciate

2010-07-09T20:56:00.003-04:00

It's good to know that although I seem to be at a standstill in my career, others are doing the damn thing.

Bronx rappers Par-City, who recently opened for Slick Rick at the legendary Knitting Factory, just released this video in support of their mixtape, Held Over: The Hold Up Part 2 (you can download it here), and is one of the few indie acts out there that are Jaded-approved.

Enjoy!

Oy With The Poodles Already!

2010-05-30T00:01:00.002-04:00

I watch a lot of "TV," and I put TV in quotes because you all know I don't OWN a TV nor do I subscribe to cable service. Or maybe you didn't know... well, now you know.

But anyway, I watch a lot of TV. And sometimes, what makes or breaks a show for me is the writing. Yeah, acting and directing counts, too, but if you throw some smart, witty writing in there, everything else can sometimes fall into place.

Such is the case with Gilmore Girls.

I didn't fall in love with this show until 2007- long after it went off the air- but still, I love it! I dare say, it became a slight obsession.

Below are some of the cleverest words ever uttered by TV characters, which prove by far that members of the Writer's Guild really do deserve everything they are asking for and then some:

Luke: [telling Lorelei why he should not be in charge of kids] I have no patience for jam-hands!

Michel: Well, you know what happens when you assume.
Lorelai: What?
Michel: I don't know. Something about a donkey. It is a stupid American phrase.

Rory: I have to perform Act Five of "Romeo and Juliet" with Paris, Madeline and Louise.
Lorelai: Really?
Rory: Paris has appointed herself as director.
Lorelai: Nice. What part are you playing?
Rory: I don't know yet. She's still mulling over the screen tests right now. We're gonna find out tomorrow.
Lorelai: Screen tests?
Rory: 24 takes.
Lorelai: Ah, I so want a copy.
Rory: Forget it.
Lorelai: Sell it on the Internet, make a fortune. 'First we brought you Pamela and Tommy Lee, now prepare yourselves for the crazy antics of Rory and the Bard.'
Rory: Oh, and I told Paris that you would make all of our costumes so she wants to have a concept meeting with you tomorrow at three.
Lorelai: What?
Rory: Yeah, she needs a resume and samples of your previous work and, uh, referrals.
Lorelai: And my bare butt to kiss?
Rory: If you think that will set you apart from the other applicants, yes.

Michel: [Sookie wants Michel to choose a cookie] I don't care.
Sookie: I just need a quick opinion!
Michel: It took me two seconds to tell you I don't care, that's as quick as I get.

Logan: Rory, you're special.
Rory: Like "stop-eating-the-paste" special?

Sookie: Okay, here we go. Low fat, whole wheat blueberry pancakes.
Michel: Are there 12?
Sookie: 12 what?
Michel: Blueberries. I can only have 12 blueberries for breakfast.
Sookie: Or what?
Michel: What do you mean, or what?
Sookie: What happens if you eat 13 blueberries?
Michel: This is a silly conversation.
Sookie: Would you die?
Michel: Just hand me the plate.
Sookie: Only if you don't count.
Michel: I won't count.
Sookie: Swear. Raise your right hand and say, 'May Destiny's Child break up if I count these blueberries.'
Michel: [raises his hand] ... Pick another group.
Sookie: Nope.
Michel: [slams hand down] I hate you! Hate you!

Honorable mentions from other shows:

"Soul mates only exist in the Hallmark aisle of Duane Reade Drugs"- Miranda Hobbs on Sex and the City

"I love you so much I'm going to take you behind the middle school and get you pregnant."- Tracy Jordan on 30 Rock

"Don't look at me, I'm fucked up on corn bread."- Doug Wilson on Weeds

"We were on a break!"- Ross Geller on Friends

Adios, LOST!

2010-05-26T00:01:00.001-04:00

Welp, there it went. Six years of my life devoted to an amazing show that kept me at the edge of my seat, biting my nails off during every episode and now it's all over.

I'm not sure how to feel. Sure, you might say, "Jaded, it's a TV show. STFU and get over it." Well, imagine YOUR favorite TV show ends, or they cancel basketball, or your favorite musician dies. Wouldn't YOU be feeling some kind of way?

I honestly want to applaud the writers for how they handled the story from beginning to end. I was so afraid of getting a cookie-cutter ending, all wrapped up in a bow, all questions answered, etc, etc. They found a way to conclude the story of how these strangers became a part of each others lives in what I considered to be a very innovative way.

The entire sixth season I watched, wondering why we were getting two stories at once. Why the alternate universe storyline? I admit at being highly suspect and frustrated. But the last episode was really good at bringing the show to a close. (I'm not going to go into details or spoilers; if you want to know what happened log onto ABC.com and watch for yourself or read the episode recap on Television Without Pity.)

I know many people who gave up on LOST a while ago, tired of all the cryptic episodes and rotating cast of backup characters. But I knew... I knew it would all pay off in the end. Please trust that I will be purchasing the entire box set of this soon-to-be classic TV series, and it will sit on the shelf right next to me box set of Sex and the City and Buffy, The Vampire Slayer.

British Jazziness + Babies = JadedFun

2010-05-25T23:15:00.002-04:00

The babies and I have been grooving to Jamie Cullum's latest CD since Monday. We love us some him!

Ever since he brought Twentysomething to the US I've been a fan, even saw him live TWICE. And not too many artists can make me actually purchase a real CD at a store. Jamie is one of the chosen few.

Even got the babies "Hooked on Cullum"

Tyra would be so proud at K and her "wind in the hair" moment, right?!

Here are the latest singles/videos from The Pursuit:

Wheels

Don't Stop The Music (cover)

And my favoritest from the CD:

I Think, I Love

Fall in love with him, too. I dare you NOT to :)

Lyrics To Love: Human By The Pretenders

2010-05-03T12:20:00.004-04:00

I play a good game,
But not good as you
I can be a little cold, but you can be so cruel
I'm not made of brick, I'm not made of stone
But I had you fooled enough
To take me on
If love was a war, it's you who has won
While I was confessing it, you held your tongue
Now the damage is done...

[Chorus:]
Well there's blood in these veins
And I cry when in pain
I'm only human on the inside
And if looks can deceive
Make it hard to believe
I'm only human on the inside

I thought you'd come through,
I thought you'd come clean
You were the best thing I should never have seen
But you go to extremes, you push me too far
Then you keep going 'til you break my heart
Yeah, you break my heart
See I bleed and I bruise, oh, but what's it to you
I'm only human on the inside
And if looks could deceive,
Make it hard to believe
I'm only human on the inside
I crash and I burn, maybe some day you'll learn
I'm only human on the inside
I stumble and fall, baby, under it all
I'm only human on the inside
And the damage is done...

[Chorus]

I crash and I burn, maybe some day you'll learn
I stumble and fall, baby, I do it all
I'm only human on the inside

--------
Every time I hear this song I can't help but feel like it was written as my theme song. What's yours?

Plotline Pet Peeves: Stupid Characters, Vol. 1

2010-01-20T01:07:00.004-05:00

You've seen it a million times: A movie character is in cahoots with a bad guy, a bad guy who has divulged all of his bad deeds to the character. Then it happens- the character and the bad guy get into an argument and the character STUPIDLY says to the bad guy, "I will tell the cops EVERYTHING!"

And gets shot all up in his face.

This scene/situation runs rampant in movies and TV shows and frankly, I'd like writers to stop being so goddamn lazy. WHO on this planet is stupid enough to say to a mafioso, drug dealer, pimp: "I will tell the cops EVERYTHING!"?!?! Whyyyyy? WHOOOOOOO?

I know, I know, it's not real. We should suspend belief a little. Give the "stupid character" device a chance to move the plot along, but you know what? I DON'T WANT TO. And if you prefer quality entertainment that doesn't assume the viewers are plum idiots you'd agree with me.

Am I being a harsh movie snob? Probably. Do I care? Nope. Not as long as lazy writers don't care about the product they put out.

*side eye*

How 'Bout A Round Of Applause?!

2010-01-12T15:58:00.005-05:00

The business of entertainment can get real hairy and underhanded and despicable at times, and never has this been more evident than with NBC and its recent late night show-shuffle.

A little back story: Jay Leno retired from The Tonight Show and headed for Prime Time on NBC. The legendary Tonight Show seat was filled by Conan O'Brien, who'd been hosting the Late Night Show all this time, waiting patiently for his brass ring. With Conan's job up for grabs, in enters Jimmy Fallon + The Roots to take over the Late Night Show. Sounds good, right?

Well, NBC didn't count on the Prime Time audience not being in tune with Leno's "brand of comedy" before 11:30, or the fact that the other networks had better programming on at 10PM. So for reasons I'm not privy to they've decided to move Leno to 11:05PM, Conan to 12:05 and poor Jimmy to what I call The Obscurity Hour. I mean really- who's staying up until 2AM to watch Jimmy Fallon?

Conan, however, was not in the mood to bend over for NBC and issued a statement saying:

Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn't the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.

So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn't matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.

Source: Huffington Post

When I read that I wanted to jump out of my seat and cheer to the high heavens. My cynical side still thinks it's a negotiating tactic but you know what? That's OK. I've never been a champion of networks playing musical chairs with TV shows. Everyone knows that most of the time if you move a show it will lose a bulk of its ratings and audience. It's the kiss of death.

On one hand I understand that TV is a business and ratings = money. But at what point will the network businesses decide its customers (read: viewers) are important factors in this mix and ask the advertisers to take a few steps back? When will they truly accept that TV has become so much more than just another way to sell us things we don't need? That it is an institution that we revere and adore and remember fondly whenever we speak of our childhood?

Or is this just the artist in me shouting from my soapbox?

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Crazy Ass Hoes: Dexter S04 E04

2009-10-22T20:31:00.003-04:00

Ay what an episode full of estrogen gone so god-damned wrong! I barely know where to begin.

How about with Maria pulling the whole, "Where is this relationship going/what is our label?" on Angel. And you should have seen the PANIC on his face, and then she gets all walled up, backtracking... UGH, these two make me so mad sometimes. Basically she wants to tell the brass about their relationship but they're stuck on DEFINING it. This is gonna get messier before it gets right.

Or maybe with that heifer reporter who double-crossed Quinn- I TOLD YOU, FOOL!!! And now he wants to put his foot down. Well, too late! You should've squashed her loose lips from jump.

Or how about we talk about Deb's stupid ass hooking back up with Agent Old Fart even though Anton is nothing but awesome to her? She made me sooooo mad that in my notes I wrote, "Deb, you are DEAD to me"... 5 seconds before she got shot. Foot, meet mouth.

Or perhaps we can talk about the lady cop who thought she was a smarty mcsmartypants only to find out that Dexter is smarter? Yeah, bitch- you kill your family and get away with it? Dexter will find + get you. Every time.

Right. So you see my point.

But what I need to know now is:

1- Am I right about Serial Killer Lithgow targeting Lundy? Could he be the shooter?
2- Who's gonna die- Lundy, Deb or both? And how will Anton feel about losing a chick to an old wrinkled loser?
3-Why is Dexter's ghost dad being such an asshole as of late?

Inquiring minds want to know...

Two Down, One To Go: Dexter S04 E03

2009-10-13T13:40:00.004-04:00

I really should cease all complaints I have in this life because the writers of Dexter give me a reason to live every week...

DEB- Why does she insist on sabotaging what she has with Anton just because of Agent Old Fart? I'm getting so mad at her nitpicking at him and everything he does just because she has unresolved daddy issues with Lundy. Get it the fuck together, Deb. Anton is a good dude!

QUINN- Can you please stop thinking with your penis? PLEASE? This reporter is out for the scoop, not your bod. Don't you see that? Why are your lips so loose? Why are you telling her all this info that is supposed to be kept out of the press? Why do you think you can trust this wench? UGH!

ANGEL & MARIA- Y'all are playing with fire, literally, so I suggest if you want to have your little nooners you come clean with your superiors about your relationship. That is all.

SERIAL KILLER LITHGOW- Dude... you are RUTHLESS! But I'm starting to see the method to your madness. JADED PREDICTION: Lithgow is killing people in the same fashion he killed his own family... his sister, his mother and then his father. I BET YOU that's what's going on (or some variation of that). If I've learned anything in my years of watching shows about serial killers it's that they all have a specific reason for doing what they do. So he's already killed the sister victim in the 1st episode, the mom victim in this episode so all we're waiting for is who he will choose as the dad. My vote? LUNDY!!!

DEXTER- Darling, I have some suggestions for how you need to proceed with your life right now.

1- You need to let Astrid know that her behavior is unacceptable. That little girl's attitude is annoying the hell out of me for REAL! I'm two seconds away from jumping through the screen with my chancleta to whoop her my damn self.

2- Don't bother with those dudes in your neighborhood. Suburbia breeds a weird type of husband that, trust me, you don't want to be involved with at all. Just stick to killing people and helping Miami Metro solve crimes and you'll be alright.

3- Please keep a better eye on Quinn, Deb and Agent Old Fart; if you get found out I feel like the show will jump the shark and I won't have anything else to watch anymore!

xoxo,
Jaded

Finding Gomez: Dexter S04 E02

2009-10-05T11:32:00.002-04:00

Another rollercoaster ride of an episode on this week's Dexter. Are you ready?

AGENT OLD FART & DEB: Did she EVER make an ass of herself this week, gettin all highfalutin and thinking that Agent Old Fart came back for her. CORRECTION, Deb- dude really is trying to solve a murder, not get back in your panties. Feel free to pick up your face on the way out.

Oh, and that little over-excitement and "I Love Yous" when Anton came home? Dude, it's so obvious you're not over Lundy...

ANGEL & MARIA: Why y'all playin? You two make the most beautiful couple... don't fuck it up with power trips and all that mess. True- office romances are a recipe for KABOOM but still... I think it's so sexy how y'all speak Spanish together when you're alone. Makes me rethink my whole NO LATINOS dating policy!

QUINN: You stupid, horny, corrupt bastard! What the fuck is wrong with you? Must I crawl into the screen and kick your ass? Don't make me... I just hate it when I can't read a shady characters full-on shady intentions. Where are the writers going with you? I must know NOW!

SERIAL KILLER LITHGOW: See, it's characters like you that have me giving every stranger the screw face, especially those who try to be nice and courteous. Watching you scope out your victims took creepy to the next level. I've already forgotten the happy-go-goofy Dick Solomon you used to portray. Now you're just some PSYCHO! AACK!

And DEXTER!!!: LAWD LAWD LAWD did you ever dodge the biggest motherfucking bullet of all time! Like seriously you need to play the lottery because your luck is impeccable. Here's a tip, dear: get some MFing sleep already!

But word of caution to the writers- I knew where Gomez's body was the whole time so you may want to step it up with your plot twists n shit. You know how upset I get when I can guess the endings!

I cannot wait for next week!

Just Say No To Drugs, Kids!

2009-09-16T02:30:00.002-04:00

Remember the good old days of preachy sitcoms??

Alex's freak out on Family Ties:

And Jessie's freak out on Saved By The Bell:

I'll tell you what, though- I never did (much) speed, thanks to these shows, so don't hate on the 80's!!

He's Baaaaaack! Dexter Returns For 4TH Season

2009-08-25T13:54:00.005-04:00

Ahhh, nothing could have salvaged my Friday night better than discovering that my favorite TV serial killer, Dexter Morgan, was back in full effect as of September 27th, except of course the fact that the first episode was already available to watch online! I saw the link was up and running but wanted to wait until the babies were gone to really enjoy it to the fullest. And WOO LAWDY enjoy it I did!

********SPOILER ALERT***********SPOILER ALERT**************
DO NOT READ IF YOU'D RATHER BE SURPRISED BY THE SERIES PREMIERE ON 9/27.

YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!!!

In this fourth installment of the Showtime original series, Dexter is now a proud (and sleepy) papa to a lil boy via his new wifey, Rita. And pay attention because the sleepy part is important.

If we remember from last season, Dexter had narrowly escaped death himself at the hands of The Skinner & also by crazy ass Jimmy Smits, whom he finally had to take down. *spills a little liquor for Jimmy*

Well, now with THOSE problems behind him, Dexter is trying his best to pick up where he left off (killing bad guys according to his dad's "code" & working for Miami Metro Police) but with the added stress of being a family guy. With a new baby. That doesn't let him sleep.

This sleep deprivation causes him to fuck up in court, which allows a killer to go free. So guess who's Dexter's new target? Mhmm. But guess who's new family situation and sleep deprivation fucks up his attempt to right a wrong, in the form of a CRAZY car accident when rushing from his own crime scene to get meds for his sick baby? Mhmm times two!!

Other subplots includes the introduction of a new serial killer, played by JOHN LITHGOW (3rd Rock From The Sun), the return of Deb's former lover, FBI Special Agent Frank Lundy (whom I lovingly call Agent Old Fart), Deb's digging into her father's past and Maria and Angel having a secret office romance. I almost exploded from all the AWESOME INFORMATION/SENSORY OVERLOAD I received in just one measly episode.

So here are the questions to be answered this season: How will Dexter explain his car accident? Will Deb choose Agent Old Fart or Sexy Ass Anton? Will Rita discover Dexter still has his apartment? AND HOW WILL THEY- OR WILL THEY- CATCH JOHN LITHGOW?!?!

I cannot wait to find out.

Saying I Love You vs. Loving: A Review of Adam

2009-08-24T16:33:00.007-04:00

Let me being by stating that, for me to enjoy a film 3 things have to be in place: Clever, intelligent writing, believable & talented actors and a director who knows how to bring emotion out of the celluloid and into my very soul. Dramatic- yes, but it's what I require nonetheless.

I can happily report that Max Mayer's Adam, Starring Rose Byrne (The Dead Girl, "Damages") and Hugh Dancy (Black Hawk Down, Blood and Chocolate) fit all three of those requirements and made for a most delightful trip to the movies on a rainy Sunday evening.

Byrne plays Beth, a young writer/teacher who moves into a brownstone upstairs from Dancy's Adam, a high functioning autistic engineer who's been recently left parent-less. When they meet, Beth is intrigued by Adam's strange candidness and he in turn is smitten with her. Well, about as smitten as someone with Asperger's Syndrome can be smitten, anyway.

Beth struggles with whether or not she can really be in a relationship with Adam, as well as some family issues that arise with her parents (played by Peter Gallgher & Amy Irving) and he struggles with learning to be in a relationship, with the help of his father's old war buddy (played by Frankie Faison). What comes of it is truly a lovely glimpse into our collective struggle to find love & fullfilment, and also a keen lesson on improving human interactions & conversations.

Seems heavy, right? I swear it's not. At it's core, it's just another BOY MEETS GIRL love story that is really, truly moving. And the amount of adorably touching moments abound, but I've only listed three for you here...

Adorably Touching Moment #1: Adam dons a space suit in order to clean Beth's soot-covered windows so that she can see the stars at night.

Adorably Touching Moment #2: Adam's trek out to Westchester to find Beth... I can't say more or I'll ruin it for you!

Adorably Touching Moment #3: Seeing the finished product of Beth's book. I think I almost shed a tear when it was revealed.

The scene that resonated the most with me, however, was some advice that Beth's mother doled out as Beth was deciding if being with Adam- who is unable to share real emotions because of his autism- will be enough for her. Beth tells her mom, "He's never even said 'I love you.'" And her clever, clever mother counters with, "There's saying I love you, and then there's loving." COULD YOU JUST KISS MAYER FULL ON THE LIPS for that amazing bit of dialogue?

In a time when so many "love stories" (The Ugly Truth, Love Happens, etc) on film are just cookie-cutter formula-ridden drivel, it's so refreshing to see something like Adam- fresh, new, unconventional and real, 3-dimensional look at love.

-------------------

Adam (2009). 99 min. Written and Directed by Max Mayer. Starring Rose Byrne, Hugh Dancy, Peter Gallagher, Amy Irving and Frankie Faison.

Now I'm Homesick For Real

2009-08-10T17:46:00.000-04:00

My cousin sent me this video and OMG I just want to hop a plane to DR and sip agua de coco on the beach. Is that so much to ask? DAMN!

But, um, Cuco Valoy is still alive? WORD? Nadie me dijo! Go on wit yo bad self, Cuco!!

What The Hell Is A Key Grip?

2009-07-25T09:33:00.003-04:00

I'm one of those people who will sit in a theater after a film is over and read all the credits. And when I say ALL the credits I mean ALLLLLLLL the credits. As in sound engineer and property master and soundtrack listing credits. That's right... that person you always see not budging an inch while everyone scurries out of the theater is probably me, curious as to who the 2nd assistant director was.

Don't even get me started on the gift from heaven that is the Internet Movie Database (IMDb); when that website came into my life I honestly found a reason to live. It's like a movie-credit-junkie's wet dream... all those facts and quotes and trivia and CREDITS... ahhhhhh... I think I just jizzed in my pants at the thought of it all.

But I have to admit, as much as I get off knowing that Soldier on the Beach #4 in Saving Private Ryan was Shane Johnson (Jeremy from the 2002 film Pumpkin) I cannot tell you what some of those production jobs in the credits even mean.

The magic of the Google, however, came in very much handy, though, and after typing in "What does a best boy do in a film?" I found oh so many articles on the subject, and now consider myself a film production expert.

And fret not, young grasshopper- I won't keep the information to myself; what would be the fun in that?

According to a post on ProVideo Coalition by Matthew Jeppson & Kendal Miller, here are the job descriptions to some of the more puzzling gigs listed in movie credits:

>>Key Grip
The key grip works with the gaffer in setting and cutting lights to creating shadow effects for the set lighting and supervises camera cranes, dollies, platforms, and â€œwild wallâ€? movements according to the DP. Specific duties will include:
* Creating shadow effects
* Supervising dollie, crane, and other camera movement
* Maintenance and management of grip equipment

>>Gaffer
Also sometimes called the lighting designer, the gaffer is the chief electrician who supervises set lighting in accordance with the requirements of the DP. Specific duties will include:
* Lighting of sets and locations
* Maintenance and management of lights and lighting equipment
* Specialized electrical work such as generator operation

>>Foley Artist
The foley artist creates sound effects to accompany specific visual objects, movements, and sound sources, such as footsteps or punches. Specific duties will include:
* Generating and recording sounds to accompany specific on-screen sound sources.

Interesting shit, right? I used to think these were all so mysterious and, frankly, quite a load of bullshit that made movie tickets that much more expensive, but when you read all of the descriptions you have to admit- a lot goes into making even the tiniest of independent films. A lot.

So don't you think at the very least you can sit in the theater and read the names of all the people that worked hard to entertain you? Especially the dude who worked hard to design the titles... he chose that font just for you.

*To read the article in its entirety, click here.

These Kids Give NYC A Bad Name

2009-07-25T08:21:00.003-04:00

While perusing the internets to find something new to watch (you know, to replace all the shows I watch during the regular season that are on a break or canceled) I came upon this shiteous new reality program, NYC Prep.

Let me preface this by saying that I used to work at one of these prep schools way back when so I've met kids like this in person, and most of them were super sweet. At least they were super sweet to my face.

And I also worked at an all-girls' boarding school where many of them were ridiculously wealthy so I know first hand how out of control these rich kids can get.

But this show... ugh... I feel like the producers went out of their way to find the most stereotypically obnoxious Upper Manhattan trust fund babies to speak for a whole crop of NYers that not many know exist.

I have a few choice observations about this show.

1- These brats do not represent NYC. At all. Please don't think all of us- rich, poor or in between- have this mentality. We're not all stuck up, self-absorbed assholes, I promise. Jaded, definitely, but not that other stuff.

2- The parents of the kids on this show need to be whooped for not teaching their children better. I mean, they're out clubbing, drinking, having sex, all unsupervised and allowed to wipe their asses with money just because they can.

3- Hearing him talk, one would imagine that Sebastian kid needs to be at the free clinic every other day. "If you go to enough parties, you can hook up with anywhere from 6 to 40 girls in a month." Really? My groin is on fire just HEARING you say that.

4- Jess, darling, can you please just admit you have a hard-on for PC and stop acting like you're just friends?

5- PC, can you not be a douche for like 2 seconds? Because frankly, and maybe this is because I'm not a white 16 year old girl, you are not as charming and attractive as you think you are. Not by a long shot.

Reality show was already scraping the bottom of the barrel with all those "love" shows on VH1 and something I saw advertised about people addicted to plastic surgery, but NYC Prep is not just dumb, it's boring.

And you know what's even worse than any of the petty complaints I have about the show? The fact that I'll probably be tuning in again next week. Seriously.

Someone should come over here and unplug my cable modem...

What Depression Looks Like: A Review Of Something Is Killing Tate

2009-07-21T16:14:00.004-04:00

Netflix is a beautiful thing, because it allows me to view a plethora of films from the comfort of my beautifully comfortable sofa. Which is exactly where I sat as I watched Something is Killing Tate- a tale of internal demons, depression and learning to love.

Tate (Jocko Sims of Dreamgirls and the Crash TV show) is hella depressed; you know this in the first five minutes of the movie because he downs half a bottle of aspirin and washes it down with drain cleaner. Dude is no joke about being dead, but as his story unfolds you can easily see why.

After his dance with the devil, Tate's friends, fiance and family (Luz Beato, Myron Davis, Vashon Caprice; Aliza Pearl; and Robin Dionne Smith and Kevin Nichols, respectively) attempt to get at the core of what's bothering him, but all Tate wants to do is sit in the dark and smoke cigarettes. And I can hardly blame him.

For an indie flick with virtually unknown actors, Something is Killing Tate is very well done: the acting, dialogue and direction (by writer/director Leon Lozano) leave one wondering why this never made it to big screens around the country. Then I remembered: nothing blew up and there's only about 5 seconds of nudity... there just isn't a market for smart, African-American films heavy on intellectually alluring content. Maybe if Tate's great-aunt was Madea... but I digress...

The themes covered in this movie- child abuse, fidelity, self-worth- are handled in a realistic fashion. While the characters could have been more fleshed out their dialogue was believable even in the most contrived of situations. Sims shines in his role as Tate with an exceptional ability to depict the true face of depression on the screen.

Heart Wrenching Moment #1:
>Young Tate being forced to eat food from the trash at the hands of his evil stepfather.

Heart Wrenching Moment #2:
>Grown Tate...and a gun... I won't say more so as not to spoil the film for you.

Heart Wrenching Moment #3:
>Young Tate finding his sister... well, I don't want to ruin that for you, either.

Very rarely do I find a movie like this, one that I can watch over and over and never tire of it, but Something is Killing Tate is one of them. My only complaint: the cookie-cutter resolution towards the end. I could've done without that for sure.

-------------------

Something is Killing Tate (2008). 78 min. Written and Directed by Leon Lozano. Starring Jocko Sims, Aliza Pearl, Luz Beato and Robin Dionne Smith.

"...We Are Temporary Arrangements..."

2009-05-07T12:14:00.004-04:00

I'm reconnecting with my deep-seated adoration for fellow Gemini, Alanis Morissette:

No Pressure Over Cappuccino

"Is it just me or are you fucked up?"

Are YOU The King Or Queen Of Movie Quotes?

2009-02-16T00:01:00.001-05:00

There's one simple way to find out!

Below are 20 quotes from random movies of a variety of genres. You need to name the character who said it, the film from which it hails, and the actor who played that character. And yes, spelling counts, as does the accuracy of the movie titles and character names. Email your answers to me at:

rpenzo@thejadednyer.net

The FIRST email I receive with the MOST CORRECT answers is the winner.

Your prize? Well, bragging rights, of course. OH, and a copy of the audio book The Black List, new and never opened, still shrink wrapped even!

Ready to play? OK... let's go!

1- "You'll stay up til this job shines like the top of the Chrysler Building!"

2- "I haven't got time for this Mickey Mouse bullshit."

3- "Liking both Marvin Gaye and Art Garfunkel is like supporting both the Israelis and the Palestinians."

4- "If Brooke Shields married Groucho Marx their child would have your eyebrows!"

5- "I can't go all my life waiting to catch you between husbands."

6- "I didn't bring your breakfast, because you didn't eat your din-din!"

7- "You want a lesson? I'll give you a lesson. How 'bout a geography lesson? My father's from Puerto Rico. My mother's from El Salvador. Neither one of those is Mexico."

8- "You tell me where my suit is, woman! We are talking about the greater good!"

9- "Whether or not what we experienced was an According to Hoyle miracle is insignificant. What is significant is that I felt the touch of God. God got involved."

10- "There isn't a day in my life when I haven't felt like a fraud. I mean priests, doctors, I've talked to them all. I don't know anyone who hasn't felt that."

11- "Well, I see your hobbies include 'drinkin', smokin' weed, and all kinds of ill shit.'"

12- "The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care."

13- "A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark."

14- "Maybe if you showed Dr. Zaius the proper respect, Dr. Zaius would stop showing you the POO!"

15- "I want to lie together without clothes on."

16- "When she jumped, she probably thought she could fly."

17- "Don't let them bury me! I'm not dead!"

18- "Jay, do you think the Germans would let some Jew in Poland send $9,000 to some Jew in Alabama?"

19- "Stern, if this factory ever produces a shell that can actually be fired, I'll be very unhappy."

20- "This whole baby thing baffles me, I mean you have it, you raise it, you basically screw it up, it resents you, feels guilty for resenting you and then it has a baby, which only perpetuates the vicious cycle."

How many do YOU know???

Bilinguality With Hilarity

2009-01-22T22:56:00.001-05:00

I saw a post where Quisqueya mentioned her family being somewhat like the family on ¿Qué pasa, U.S.A.?, and man, I just remembered how much I swooned over Steven Bauer (aka Rocky Echevarría) and loved that show so much. It was totally the carbon copy of my house, too.

This particular episode is so very relevant right this minute, seeing as there is so much talk around the nation about race relations now that we have a Black president.

Enjoy my trip down memory lane:

I wonder if Steven is still a Hottie McHottie... I'd totally do him three ways from Sunday and back again!

So Much Better Than Disney!

2009-01-19T21:22:00.001-05:00

Did I mention my girl crush on Rosario? Yeah, she could get it...

Why I Won't Be Seeing Notorious In Theaters

2009-01-13T12:07:00.004-05:00

Aspiring screenwriter/filmmaker that I am, I understand the hypocrisy of me watching bootleg movies online instead of shelling out the dough at the local theater. No, really, I get it.

My defense: TOO MANY MOVIES are terribly awful, and not worth the price of admission, but still something I'd watch for free in the comfort of my home on a lazy Sunday afternoon. I mean, how else can I dis movies like "This Christmas" and "How She Move" and "Descent" if I haven't seen them? So I watch online.

DEAR FILMMAKERS: If you want me to pay money for your film, make it worth my time!

Enter Notorious, the biopic about rapper/hip hop artist Christopher Wallace. At first I was mildly curious. Then people started hyping it up, talking about going to premieres, etc, and I started to get excited.

And then... I saw clips of the film courtesy of BlackFilms.com...

TERRIBLE!! Lord help me- the acting is atrocious, the dialogue? Laughable! I mean who wrote this- Biggie's son??

And if we're being completely honest, I loved Biggie's music and his on-stage swagger/persona. But I never cared about or was interested in his back story and avoided his interviews, etc, because HE does not interest me as a person. As an artist, absolutely- he put out some of the illest tracks out there and I'll rep BK with those songs til I die!

But to ask me to pay $12 to sit through a flick where I'd have to hear THAT voice speaking for over 90 minutes??? Stare at "Faith Evans'" fake ass wig/weave? Cringe at that sophomoric screenplay?

I'd rather see The Jonas Brothers in concert.

I'll just catch that joint online next month.

"Se De Un Tonto Que Te Quiere..."

2009-01-04T20:42:00.003-05:00

"...y que se enamoro de ti..."

My mom was always playing Juan Gabriel in the house when I was growing up, and I could not help but grow to LOVE LOVE LOVE him.

And here's why:

He's a very talented and revered Mexican singer who, seriously, make you FEEL the song he's singing. See:

Hasta Que To Conoci - one of his classics

La Farsante - he's really pissed in this one, watch

Querida - his other classic

Oh who am I kidding, they are all his classics.

Hope you enjoyed it!

New Lily Allen - The Fear

2008-12-04T21:44:00.001-05:00

I do love her, and her lil pop self.

Here's her new video:

Cute, no?

She's A Gypsy Like Me

2008-12-02T21:16:00.002-05:00

We even have similar hair.

I love her.

SANG it Rosario, SANG it!!

I hear this song and instantly I'm reminded of Lolita

(here they are together)

How much talent can one family have? I love these ladies.

Here's some classic Lolita for you, too:

(with Raphael in 1999)

(from 1976, when I became her number 1 fan lol)

*sigh*

Sometimes I think this is the only way I will ever see Spain. Through the Flores' music.

The Writers On Dexter Just Upped The Ante

2008-12-01T10:17:00.003-05:00

Holy crappity crap crap CRAP!!!!!

The Skinner (AKA Jesse Borrego of "Fame" "Con Air" and "I Like It Like That") just totally kidnapped Dexter because stupid-ass Miguel (AKA Jimmy Smits... I don't have to tell you what he was in, he's Jimmy Smits, dammit!) told him Dexter knew where Freebo was.

UGH!!

My heart is RACING!!

The last time Dexter was in this situation, the Ice Truck Killer had Deb and was ready to bleed her dry, but I don't think he's ever been the victim... how will he get out of it? OMG I can't breathe...

In other plot twists, Maria is totally suspicious of Miguel now; I can tell by the way she watched him drive away from her house. And Deb and Anton had better work this shit out because they are a darn cute couple and dammit- nobody needs dick more than Deb does!!

I don't know about the rest of y'all, but this show is officially ten times better than anything else on right now. If you're not hip to it you're an ass.

You Know I Love Dem White Gals

2008-11-24T00:44:00.002-05:00

Well, here are some more:

Sarah Bareilles - Love on the Rocks

Sia - Day Too Soon

Tori Amos - Silent All These Years

Liz Phair - Extraordinary

Garbage - Special

We Want Each Other Oh So Much...

2008-11-10T10:27:00.001-05:00

...why must we play this game?

Don't care where we go
I don't care what we do
I don't care pretty baby
Just take me with you...

Sorry, y'all... I just had a Prince moment. He comes over me (nasty!) from time to time and I'll become obsessed with one of his songs to the point that I drive everyone around me insane.

I don't care if we spend the night at your mansion
I don't care if we spend the night on the town
All I want is 2 spend the night together
All I want is 2 spend the night in your arms

Recently it was Take Me With U.

Prince - Take Me With U -

Damn that was a good song!!! Deny it, I dare you!

It's taken on special meaning for me lately, so I play it and play it and play it. I have it on iTunes AND I have the vinyl; that one I play in my room when the babies are gone and it's just me and my thoughts (and my thesis!).

Just take me with u
Oh wont u take me with u
Honey take me with u

I'm missing his Purple Majesty's pre-Jehovah days... did you know he won't even perform Darling Nikki anymore? Pure sadness...

Reason # 2,339 Why TV Owns My Soul

2008-11-08T16:46:00.005-05:00

Some shows are written so freakin' well that they speak to you. They have dialogue that, I swear to GOD, sounds like they jumped into your brain and just stole the words.

Such is the case with EP04 S04 of Dexter, "All in the Family," in which Dexter says:

"How do you show someone real love when you don't even know what it feels like?"

Goddammit, Dexter... get out of my head!!!

I love this show, and can't wait to see where the writers are taking me this season...

An Open Letter To Sarah Jessica Parker

2008-11-08T13:10:00.003-05:00

Dear Sarah:

Hey girl, what's up? How's married/mommy life treating you? Good? That's awesome. Listen, something has been on my mind lately... can we talk?

I'm hearing rumors that you and your people are in negotiations for a sequel to the Sex and the City movie.

Please, I beg of you, DON'T DO IT!!

Listen, no one loved SATC more than me. That was my show and the whole world was ignored for 22 minutes every Sunday night at 9 so I could absorb every millisecond of its fabulousness... but a sequel to a movie that was only a B- in my opinion?

Sarah, honey, think of the fans and the legacy and integrity of the characters and the show. I understand your BITTEN line at Steve & Barry's may not be doing well. Hell, the STORE is not even doing well. But I'm guessing you inked a pretty sweet deal in terms of royalties for both SATC the show and SATC the movie. You don't need anymore money.

Don't make a sequel to the movie. Learn to go out on top; you ended the show on top and that was a shrewd business decision, one I applauded immensely even if it meant I would never again see these characters on Sunday nights.

Please don't let the box office numbers lull you into a false sense of security; you know audiences are fickle, and SATC fans are intelligent women- if you throw a crappy sequel our way for the sake of making money you tarnish the reputation of the show and the characters.

I beg of you, DO NOT MAKE THIS SEQUEL! The SATC movie was cool but what could you possibly STILL have to talk about? All the loose ends were tied in the film. What is there left to say??

At the very least, please take this letter into consideration before you sign on the dotted line. Movie execs will try and lure you in with dollars, but this devoted SATC fan is BEGGING you to say no, and let Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda walk away with their dignity.

Please.

Sincerely,
The Jaded NYer

Ricky Keeps It In The Tribe

2008-09-21T17:53:00.001-04:00

I hear this song and all of a sudden I'm back in the motherland... I dare you to sit still!!

Pégate - Ricky Martin
by psyque

Did you dance? I know you did...

Please Don't Hate On My Girl XTina...

2008-09-20T00:11:00.002-04:00

Bitch can blow...

Okay, enough sappiness... I'm starting to cry like a little bitch over here

Almost Makes Me Want To Believe

2008-09-19T23:46:00.002-04:00

Lauryn has one of those voices where she could be singing about taking a dump and you'd be like, "Damn, that's my song... sing it, GIRL!!"

I miss her so much.

But I understand she's gotta do Lauryn. I'll wait.

It's A Hector Lavoe Kind Of Day

2008-09-17T10:30:00.002-04:00

Even though he dissed merengue and Dominicans back in the day... I'll forgive it because he was a beast on the mic:

(peep Willie Colon in this clip in the horn section!)

(why is Johnny Pacheco a straight fool in this clip? cocaine is a hell of a drug! lol)

Classic salsa always soothes the troubled soul. You heard it here first.

Smoosh?!?!

2008-09-11T12:26:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I get sucked into some bubblegum pop that I didn't meant to get sucked into.

Such is the case with Smoosh- two sisters (three now; their youngest sister recently joined the band) under the age of 18 who wrote and perform the cutest little song, "Free to Stay."

Whenever it comes on Pandora I find myself tapping my feet and feeling a little lighter, less Jaded, and all that good shit.

Smoosh - Free to Stay

Don't Tell Anyone...

2008-09-07T12:09:00.002-04:00

...but I'm really feelin this song.

By Miley Cyrus.

*runs away and hides in shame*

7 Things - Miley Cyrus

It's not my fault!! I live with Disney Channel addicts!!!

Before Latinos Had Reggaeton...

2008-09-01T23:18:00.003-04:00

...they ruled the airwaves with freestyle/house music.

Man do I remember those days! Here in NYC you can still relive the 90s house & freestyle era on WKTU.

Need your memory jogged? Here are some of my favorites:

Geroge Lamond - Where Does That Leave Love

TKA - Louder Than Love

Corina - Give Me Back My Heart

2 in a Room - Wiggle It

Sweet Sensation - Sincerely Yours

Cover Girls - My Heart Skips a Beat

You have any near and dear to your heart?

John Mayer Has The Blues

2008-08-31T00:46:00.003-04:00

Damn that white boy can play the HELL out of that guitar... one of my favorite tunes from his Live album:

Out of My Mind - John Mayer Trio

I've been playing this song on repeat all day long...

The Best Movie Ending Song EVER

2008-08-26T13:28:00.003-04:00

If you haven't seen Dazed and Confused, you're a loser, because it's one of the funniest, funniest, funniest movies of all time!

But I'm not here to talk about the movie (I'll do that later when I start reviewing movies again in the fall), I want to talk about the soundtrack- chock full of classic rock, baby!!

But namely this song, which to me is the absolute most perfect song to play while a movie is ending and the credits are rolling:

Tuesday's Gone - Lynyrd Skynyrd

OK, OK, stop begging! I'll post a clip from the movie already. SHEESH!

(this is the classic Matthew McConaughey "Wooderson" scene)

A Dedication To Me, Myself, and I... And All The Other Voices, Too

2008-08-22T14:10:00.004-04:00

I've been mistreating my body, mind and soul lately, feeding it all sorts of crap and not letting it have any fun or giving it room to breathe.

I heard this song today and sort of renewed vows with myself.

Back in Love Again - LTD

From here on out, it's a celebration of my love for me ;)

Lyrics To Love: You're Gonna Leave by Stephen Marley

2008-08-21T11:32:00.003-04:00

Which way from here
I'm caught up in the pages of my mind
And it's not so clear
But it seems the hurt is way too much this time
Cause I see a vaine look in your eyes
Tell me, do you see the same, same look in mine
Sandpapper kisses, papercut bliss
Don't know what this is, but it all leads to this
You're gonna leave, her
You have deceived, her
Ooh just a girl
Now here I go again
She said I'll break her heart again
She plays the fool again
She said I'll break the rules again
Though I disagree
She thinks she knows me more than me
It's so hard to see
What this voice keeps telling me
Ooh just a girl with featherweight curls
To expose all she knows you play like tease
Just a Girl with featherweight curls
To expose all she knows you play like tease
You're gonna leave, her
You have decieved, her
Ooh just a girl

*******

It's been a while since I've done one of these, but it seemed so fitting for me today. I love those Marleys to bits!!

But to get the full effect, here's the song:

You're Gonna Leave - Stephen Marley

At 11:30 PM...

2008-08-15T23:33:00.003-04:00

... Alicia Keys spoke to me. And she told me to put down my armor.

Alicia Keys - The Thing About Love (LIVE)

"Him Downstairs..." R.I.P. Bernie Mac, 10/5/57-8/9/08

2008-08-09T10:45:00.003-04:00

Oh Bernie, you left us too soon, man. Too soon...

There'll never been another one so frank and funny like you...

Earth, Wind and Fire Made Me Cry Today...

2008-08-07T10:38:00.003-04:00

...when this song played on Pandora:

After the Love Has Gone

I hate when love goes, and you think you're over it but you're not. Or even worse... when you realize you never had it to begin with...

Another Book Recommendation

2008-07-29T15:02:00.001-04:00

Fortunate Son by Walter Mosely.

Me likey a lot. So read it, dammit.

(I'll attempt a real review this weekend)

Para Ti

2008-07-29T15:00:00.002-04:00

porque estas en mis pensamientos hoy...

Jill Scott - All I

Thanks To Q

2008-07-29T02:14:00.003-04:00

I was trolling all over YouTube for these... this is for you, girl... come down memory lane with me :-D

Volvio Juanita

La Guacherna

Jenny

Pedacito De BonBon

Filete

A Nadie Le Importa

Yo Quisiera Ver (SANDY REYES!!!!!)

Si Tu No Estas

And a special treat, because you love him as much as I do:

La Quiero A Morir

Tu Vacilandome

Bala Perdida

Dile

okay... I'm gonna stop now before I start to miss the "good ol days" too much and make myself cry...

"...12 In A Room In America!"

2008-07-28T16:15:00.003-04:00

I wish Rita Moreno could reprise her role in the new West Side Story... *sigh*

$100 bucks to the person that can teach me and my babies this choreography. We're quick learners, honest!

And how totally SAD that all the things the guys sing about in this song are still TRUE?!?!

*double sigh*

What The Hell Are You Waiting For?

2008-07-24T18:23:00.002-04:00

Brooklyn's own...

...would have been much cooler if he'd stayed retired. I'm just sayin...

Jay-Z - Encore

JACK Is A Poet, Too

2008-07-24T15:27:00.003-04:00

I pushed this up on the list because Jack just reminded me I had it. I really wanted y'all to read it, because my friend Jack is an awesome poet.

In case you didn't know...

Your indecision

My mind absorbs the reality that
my heart has yet to accept
And here I go
yet again
experiencing the intangible
Feeling let down
And as I seek to splice
the disconnect within me
I accept
that it is me
who let me down
for believing it was you
who could answer my call

But I refuse to be jaded

I refuse to be jaded

I simply refuse
to give you the power
to determine my fate
to even have a say
in my destiny

I’ll rise again
Soon
Very soon
Sooner than ever before

What You Know 'Bout Richie Spice?

2008-07-17T23:54:00.002-04:00

Groovin' My Girl

That's what I thought...

I Don't Have Time For A Full Review, But...

2008-07-17T01:24:00.002-04:00

...when you get a moment, pick up the short story collection Under the Red Flag by Ha Jin.

I HIGHLY recommend it...

Um. Okay...

2008-07-16T11:27:00.002-04:00

Honey... just say no...

Why come this DR model gotta be so ghetto with it??

SMH

Omahyra Mota

Something tells me no one is looking to hire her as a spokesperson anytime soon...

Minnie Remembered This...

2008-07-15T21:10:00.004-04:00

I was telling her about the 25th Anniversary of Video Music Box, and she came up with: "Remember that video by the band who sang 'Illusion' where the water fell over this woman, and all you see is this naked, erect nipple- no clothes or anything- and the next day Ralph McDaniel's had to apologize on TV?"

Um, no, I don't, but I found the video and DAMN! That's even risque for MTV!!

Uncle Ralph- I think you owe us another apology!!

lol

Instinctual by Imagination

...And Yet, My Life Goes On

2008-07-15T14:36:00.001-04:00

Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel broke up, and Brangelina had their twins.

Yahoo News and the AP felt the need to make these two items NUMERO UNO for me- failing banks and dying soldiers be damned!

I'm getting just a liiiiiittle bit sick of celebrity news...

My Song.

2008-07-10T23:17:00.002-04:00

Literally.

Well, I mean NO the singer doesn't know me personally, but color me surprised when I saw a song called "Raquel." AND when I looked it up on iTunes there were like 8 more.

Me so popular...

Raquel - Jorge Drexler

RE: The Ice-T and Soulja Boy "Feud"

2008-06-23T09:57:00.002-04:00

1- Stop calling it a feud. It's just two dudes talking out their asses.

2- Ice T was right- Soulja Boy's music *IS* garbage and YES, he should eat a dick.

3- Soulja Boy was right, too- Ice T is old as fuck and needs to chill

4- We care about these two losers because...????

Better Late Than Never

2008-06-20T00:01:00.000-04:00

I didn't hear about Leela James until recently, but I became an instant fan.

Her voice is like BUTTAH, baby.

See if you don't fall in love:

Don't Speak (No Doubt cover)

Long Time Coming

Think (featuring Jamie Cullum on piano and vocals)

Good Time

Lauryn, sweetie, I may have found your replacement. Unless of course you want to come down from the crazy tree you're perched upon...

The Ex-Factor

DAMN! I miss that voice...

Major Props...

2008-06-19T15:42:00.002-04:00

...to Tony winner In the Heights!! It won for Best Musical. Yeah BOYEEEEEEE :)

Tony performance:

The winning moment:

They won some other awards, too, like the one for best original score:

but the Best Musical one is THE one that counts. You can tell because they ammounce it last.

Now I suppose I will have to go and see it...

In other news, Julieta Venegas' MTV Unplugged CD went straight to the top of the Latin Album charts iTunes after only one day. Because she rocks!

Julieta Venegas - Lento

Seriously, you need to get on that, for real!!

Okay, Babyface...

2008-06-18T00:01:00.000-04:00

...thanks for making me all melancholy.

What If - Babyface

No, really. Thanks.

Pandora=My New Best Friend

2008-06-15T00:01:00.001-04:00

I cannot sing the praises of this site enough. Know why? Last week, the following songs popped up at the VERY moment I needed/wanted to hear them. Eerie, right? But true...

The tide is kinda turning for The Jaded NYer. I think all this meditation I'm doing is making me, what, more mellow? Mushy? Not sure, but here's my new favorite mini-playlist:

Come Close - Common feat. MJB

Common is, of course, one of the best MCs out there, and he has a vast body of work that would make many of my TOP lists. But something about "Come Close" has kept that song near and dear to my heart.

I Got A Thang For You - Trina feat. Keyshia Cole

Say what you will about Trina, but I like her. Yeah, she's crass and whatnot, but whatever- I'd hang out with her in a heartbeat. I was surprised to hear such a mellow tune from her...me likey!

Say Goodbye - Dave Matthews Band

Okay, so, um, I'm no stranger to "coveting my neighbor's wife" and this DMB song is kind of like the cheater's anthem. Except it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy. As if you're not being immoral LOL

On The Radio - Regina Spektor

Spektor has had a lot of buzz recently, but I'm only JUST getting into her. And "On the Radio" references one of my favorite Guns n Roses songs so I instantly fell in love with it. (NOTE: this is a fan video that I loved 10x more than the actual video!!)

Comes To Light - Jill Scott

I really hope I don't have to explain why I love this Jill Scott song! I mean, she could sing the Oscar Meyer jingle and I'd pay to download it on iTunes. THAT'S how AMAZING she is.

All About Our Love - Sade

Sade is a classic beauty herself, and "All About Our Love" is a classic song in the making, along with all her trillion other songs! Hell, if I ever fall and hit my head and decide to remarry, I might be tempted to use this as "our song".

Slow Dance - John Legend

When I first heard "Slow Dance" I honestly thought it was a remake. When I found out it was the new John Legend I was like "WHOA! This dude is the real deal!" It the kind of song that makes one (not me...really...I mean it...SHUT UP!) wish they were in a relationship whenever it plays.

*****
Okay, now I'm off to play my reggae station on Pandora. All this LOVE is giving me hives!

Before I Go On Vacation...

2008-05-31T11:03:00.003-04:00

...I wanted to put this playlist* up.

It's a list of songs my cousin Minnie is rockin' to RIGHT THIS MINUTE:

Jesse McCartney - Leavin'

Scarlett Johansson - Falling Down

George Levin - I Got Somebody New

Billie Holiday - Speak Low (Bent Remix)

Coldplay - Viva La Vida

Sean Garret - Grippin'

*please note: The Jaded NYer does not endorse any of these songs... these are MINNIE'S SONGS, NOT MINE!!! LOL

Too Lazy To Continue...

2008-05-27T13:11:00.002-04:00

I hate to start something I'm not going to finish, but I didn't really think this whole "post 5-days a week" idea I started a couple of weeks back.

So this is just a placeholder to say, I'm going back to posting sporadically. Whenever the mood strikes. And save the daily posts for my main blog.

Okay... I feel better now...

I'll be back with more later in the week. In the meantime, listen to at least three artists from a genre you typically would avoid. Broaden your horizon a lil bit.

Ciao,
The Jaded NYer

Wednesday's Words: Mari Is A Poet

2008-05-21T01:46:00.003-04:00

I won't embarrass my sister by putting up the poem she wrote way back when, "Explore," which I still keep in a collection of poetry I have from way back when.

I'll just post her beautiful words from the here and now, because she's smart and talented and you might as well learn her name now, so you can say you knew her when...

I Am
by Mari

I am from the hopes of an immigrant family
struggling to find purpose in the deception of the land of opportunity
I am from the tears of poverty and
the joys of an urban childhood
I am from the home of the latch-key kids
forced to grow up way before our time
I am from plastic covered couches and tacky curtains
I am from the vibrant rhythms of merengue and the sultry passionate bachata
I am from the city that never sleeps,
where people are too rushed to look each other in the eye,
where the subway system is as complex as the cultural makeup of the neighborhoods and barrios
I am from Salami Induveca, platanos and Tang Mango
I am from the hand-me-down clothing that my sister once wore proudly and I wore grudgingly
I am from the communal Bedford Stuyvesant Head Start, the Afrocentric PS 3, the culturally resistant Big Tree Elementary, the cultural mixing bowl Ben Franklin School 13, the rigorous and utopic Townsend Harris High and the "open doors, open hearts, open minds" of Cornell University
I am my mother's daughter, my apple of my grandpa's eye, the pride of my older sister
I am the great Dominican hope, the ticket to greater success
The "smart" one
I am from a sheltered past that forced me to break free
I am from a warm church pew where I was taught to love, serve and give my all to worthwhile causes
I am from a double consciousness- an awareness of the American privilege afforded me yet a need to reaffirm the culture that is smeared across my face, in my hips, in my speech- It permeates all that i am
I am from a place of utter complexity and desired simplicity
I am from so many places and so many things
I am they and they are I

Tuesday's TV Update: LOST Is Blowing My Mind

2008-05-20T10:44:00.003-04:00

I'm soooooo glad I stuck with this show long after my friends gave up on it. I know it's frustrating and I, too, would like to know what the fuck that smoke monster is, but I can wait, because in the meantime the suspense they are building is HOT FIRE!

1- Locke is told that in order to stop Whitmore's men he needs to move the island. Excuse me? MOVE THE ISLAND? Like my daughter said, "Oh, yeah, well let me get my giant robot and take care of that right away..."

2- That creepy doctor guy who used to be on Suddenly Susan (that's right, I remember you...) is everywhere! And don't get me started on that black guy who told Locke to go on the walkabout in the flashback scenes two episodes ago... both of them are in my nightmares!

3- Hugo really is just a hot ghetto mess... dude, SHAVE, push away from the dinner table and ride a bike or something! There is no reason to be that big AND sloppy!

4- JACK AND CLAIRE ARE RELATED! Whew! It feels good to know that they finally know, since us viewers have known for a hot minute now; I'm assuming that since Claire is chillin with her dad she knows about Jack. What I don't get, though, is why was Jack told that he wasn't supposed to raise Aaron? It's his nephew so why not??

5- DUDE! I cannot wait to see why only those six came back to civilization, and why last year's season finale showed Jack telling Kate, "We have to go back!"

OMG... I cannot wait!

Dear Writers of LOST:

Please do not let me down. I am in your corner and I love your work. Please please please make it worth my time, and I'll stay with you till the very end AND buy the series box set after it's all said and done. Promise.

Just ask Darren Starr.

Love always,
The Jaded NYer

Monday's Music: Christian Rock

2008-05-19T06:48:00.004-04:00

Didn't think a heathen like me could be down with Christian music... did you??? Well, punkies, you're wrong! Music is music, and good lyrics and a tight melody will always hold my attention.

Switchfoot- Dare You To Move

Salvador- Supernatural

Flyleaf- All Around Me

This is more pop-infused, but I'd be remiss not to include her:

Stacie Orrico- More to Life

Enjoy the tunes, in Jesus' name. Amen.

Friday's Films: In The Time Of The Butterflies

2008-05-16T17:06:00.000-04:00

When I first heard the Julia Alvarez's book was going to be turned into a Showtime Original film I was excited. Until I read the cast list- Salma Hayek, Marc Anthony, Edward James Olmos, Lumi Cavazos... not a one of them Dominican. It kinda pissed me off that the story of some of the most revered figures in the Dominican Republic would be portrayed by any one else except my fellow countryman (yeah, I know I'm US born... shut up...).

In the Time of the Butterflies is the dramatized story of The Mirabal Sisters- Minerva, Maria Teresa, Patria and Dede; women involved in the revolutionary movement to oust the dictator Trujillo (played by Olmos). Their underground nicknames were Las Mariposas, hence the title. In Santo Domingo, there's a huge monument in their honor, and the day of their assassination, November 25th, is observed as the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women.

I saw the film and I have to admit... they did I good job with it. Salma is a great actress- undeniably, as were the others. I still had my issues, like WHY didn't they film it in Spanish with English subtitles? That would have made it more authentic. And the scene where the Mirabal mother dances with Marc Anthony's Virgilio... she can't dance! What self-respecting Dominican woman can't merengue?? I was appalled!

The film also didn't really follow the book too much, so that was sucky. But all in all, I can't hate on Salma for producing this film. She did a decent job; at least the story got told. And when she comes sniffing around to buy the movie rights to my book, I might just let her.

Shiiit, better her than J.Lo!!

For your viewing pleasure, a documentary featuring the last surviving Mirabal sister, Dede, Las Hermanas Mirabal:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Thursday's Theater: Tony Nominations Of Note

2008-05-15T22:06:00.002-04:00

I won't bore you with all the nominees, just the ones that matter to me:

In The Heights was nominated for 13 Tonys, including Best Musical, Best Performance by a Leading Actor in a Musical, Best Performance by a Featured Actor in a Musical, and Best Performance by a Featured Actress in a Musical.

Macbeth is up for Best Revival against Les Liaisons Dangereuses, and Best Performance by a Leading Actor in a Play for Patrick Stewart- WooHoo!!

Special shout out to my girls Martha Plimpton, Laurie Metcalf and S. Epatha Merckerson for their respective nominations... good job, ladies!!!

For the complete list of nominees, click here.

See you on Broadway...

Wednesday's Words: British Poet Ruth Padel, Voodoo Shop

2008-05-14T12:46:00.005-04:00

I met Ms. Padel during my first writing residency in Wroxton, England in January of 2005, and at first I rolled my eyes because, well, I'm not very good at poetry and therefore stay away from it. HOWEVER, Ms. Padel got up in front of us and recited some really intense and thought provoking words from her latest collection...from memory!! I was hella impressed!

That collection, Voodoo Shop, has definitely made me a little bit more open to obscure poetry, although not by much. It's also awakened a teeny, tiny bit of optimism in me with regards to love: finding it, keeping it, feeling it.

One poem in particular gives me the warm fuzzies whenever I read it. "Writing to Onegin" has a stanza that stands out and begs me to pay attention. In the poem the author is writing a letter to a man she's not sure will return her affection and/or devotion. Half way through it she starts to doubt whether or not the love letter is a good idea- what if he doesn't feel the same...

She sighs. The paper trembles as she presses down
The pink wax seal. Outside, a milk mist clears
From the shimmering valley. If I were her guardian
Angel, I'd divide myself. One half would holler
Don't! Stay on an even keel! Don't dollop over
All you are, to a man who'll go to town
On his next little fling. If he's entranced today
By the way you finger your throat inside its collar,
Tomorrow there'll be Olga, Nicole, Jane. But then I'd whisper
Go for it, petal. Nothing's as real as what you write.
His funeral, if he's not up to it. What we feel
Is mortal, and won't come again.

Damn that bitch can write!!

And then, "The Grief Maps" is a great lullaby for those mourning the end of a relationship- BOY did that poem help me through some tough times. Although Padel wrote it about her deceased father it is easily translatable to apply to any relationship.

And THEN you get to "Home Cooking" and it's like WHOA:

You spread our Free Range Duck
Breasts with your trade-mark mix

Of honey, soya, Chinese Five Spice
While I etch
A fingernail down your spine

Ending in a fuck
The length of our kitchen table

Making the bread-board rise
To its feet, the dog beneath us whine,
And the Sainsbury's poultry burn

OKAY?? What the hell, Ruth? I was reading that on the train- NOT COOL! I almost humped the Asian busboy sitting next to me!

It's a good collection of work; some go completely over my head but for the most part I enjoyed it. I mean, I must have because I keep reading that shit over and over and over!!

Tuesday's TV Update: Brothers & Sisters Season Finale

2008-05-13T12:20:00.005-04:00

As far as I'm concerned, this was the show's series finale. With that last episode Brothers & Sisters has officially Jumped the Shark.

So okay, Rebbecca is not a Walker, but they all still feel close to her- I can buy that. This girl was by Nora's side day and night while Justin was in Iraq, so yeah, she should still be welcomed into the family.

Kitty is resigned to adopting after invitro didn't work. Cool; very plausible. Especially after that great, great talk she had with Sarah- that was some of the coolest advice on motherhood EVER; LOVED IT!

Kevin going out to Arizona to convince Scotty's parents to attend the ceremony? Beautiful and touching, and the only reason I tuned in. (on a side note- was it just me or did Scotty's mom look younger than Tommy?? BAD CASTING... I'm just saying...)

But Sarah finding out about ANOTHER possible love child? And Kevin coming across the missing link of information the way he did? I'm done. The writers have taken this suspension of disbelief and dropped kicked me in the stomach with it.

I take it us viewers are now supposed to wait on pins and needles while they find this Ryan kid, as well as deal with both Nora AND Holly feeling betrayed by William? Funk that.

The show had a good run but I'm soooo over it. And don't even get me started on the whole Rebbecca/Justin make-out party on top of that hill. GUH-ROSS!!!

Penzo OUT!

Monday's Music: Oh My God- I Like Country!!!

2008-05-12T09:59:00.003-04:00

Damn iTunes and their "free downloads"!!! They KNOW I can't resist free shit!!!

I downloaded this little diddy:

and now I'm totally obsessed with it!

So might as well confess... I maybe sometimes listen to a few country songs on the sly when no one is around.

Just shut up, OKAY?!?!?!

Friday's Films: "Edward, Don't Lick Max" A Review of Penelope

2008-05-09T04:32:00.000-04:00

Rarely does a cheezy fairytale love story grab my attention, but Penelope- starring Christina Ricci and James McAvoy, was just so... how do I put this... cute!

It's about a young girl (Christina Ricci) who falls prey to a family curse, and the only way to remove this curse is to find true love with "one who will love her faithfully." So her parents try and marry her off, except this curse is visibly on her face. So NO ONE will marry this poor girl. The subplot includes the fact that, to avoid media scrutiny, Penelope's parents (played to perfection by Catherine O'Hara and Richard E. Grant) faked the child's death and kept her indoors. Only one reporter, Lemon (Pinker Dinklage), with an axe to grind refuses to buy the death, and makes it his job to expose the family.

Enter McAvoy's Max; he's hired by Lemon and a chickenshit heir, Edward (funny funny Brit Simon Woods) to pretend to love Penelope so that he can get a photo of her for the tabloids.

But, oh yes, you guessed it, things don't quite work out as planned...

Funny But True
Even with the supposedly "hideous deformities" with which Penelope is cursed, Ricci's beauty is freakin' undeniable! It's just unfair for someone to be that beautiful! Ever since I saw her in Mermaids I've loved those big eyes of hers, and the contrast of her dark hair and milky skin. So it was a bit hard to accept that these dudes wouldn't marry her because of one tiny deformity.

The Line In The Movie That Sealed The Deal For Me
Max: (referring to Edward) Good God, he licked me.
Lemon: Edward, don't lick Max.

Why I'd Recommend This Cheesy Fairytale
I'm not really the sappy type (read: I'm so incredibly sappy y'all don't even KNOW!) but I love Christina Ricci and I love a well written movie. Penelope was both.

The acting was on point, suspension of disbelief was working for me and it wasn't as cheesy as it could have been. There was some really smart dialogue throughout, especially the interactions between Penelope and Max. The fairytale aspect of it was actually really endearing and would appeal to kids and adults alike.

Plus, hello- Reese Witherspoon has a wicked cool cameo!!

I say, give it a shot

----------------------

Penelope (2006). 104 min. Written by Leslie Caveny and directed by Mark Palansky. Starring Christina Ricci, James McAvoy, Catherine O'Hara and Reese Witherspoon.

Thursday's Theater: Summer Must-See List

2008-05-08T12:10:00.000-04:00

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof

I heard on another blog that Cat on a Hot Tin Roof is back on Broadway... starring Terrence Howard. And while Terrance is away for a lil bit, guess who's filling in for him? BORIS KODJOE!!

I might have to see this bad boy TWICE- once for eye candy and once for substance lol

In The Heights

My daughter saw this and said it was so good she wants to see it again. So of course I have to go and support my peoples on Bway!

Equus

Four words: Daniel Radcliffe Full Frontal... I'm a sucker for cock-shots...

Macbeth

I was soooo mad when this production, starring Patrick Stewart, was sold out at BAM, but lookie here now- IT'S ON BROADWAY!! YAY!!

Wednesday's Words: The Interpreter by Suki Kim

2008-05-07T00:41:00.000-04:00

In her novel, The Interpreter, Suki Kim uses three techniques that are used to push along the story about a woman searching for herself that is part literary fiction and part murder mystery: the use of flashbacks and memory, the third person voice via broken prose and the omission of the protagonist’s native language, Korean.

Kim curiously uses the third person throughout the novel instead of the more intimate first person, but as you read further and get to know the protagonist, the reason is obvious- Suzy Park is detached from herself and everyone around her. Kim uses all three techniques cleverly, even to the point of making me rethink the overabundance of Spanish sprinkled throughout my own work.

It is apparent from the first paragraph that the main character, Suzy Park, is a lost woman in a big city where it is easy to get lost- “Cigarette at 9 A.M. is a sure sign of depression.” Kim also makes it known that although Suzy hides away in an attempt at an apathetic life, she is in search of her own identity. Kim lays out the framework for this recurring theme by using Suzy’s flashbacks and memories as illustration.

Intertwined in the present action are bits and pieces that bring clarity to the reader with regards to Suzy and the Park family. For example, in one section, Kim has Suzy recall a particular fixation with a mirror in an elevator in their old apartment in Korea. Suzy remembers being too short to see her own reflection, yet too tall upon her father’s shoulders to see anything other than her “dangling feet”. Kim shows the reader that even as a child, Suzy could not “see” herself, only bits and pieces at a time.

Another memory emphasizes Suzy’s detachment from any sort of identity, words spoken to her by an old lover that haunts Suzy throughout the book: “What do you want after all, do you want me to tell you?” Even with someone she is supposed to be intimate with, Suzy is not herself and knows not what she wants or who she is. Kim repeats this sentence many times at points where Suzy really doubts her wants, needs and in essence, existence.

The language in the novel is almost a conversational prose that is urgent and intensifies the reader’s understanding of Suzy in her plight to solve her parents’ murder. During a meeting with a detective in charge of the case, Kim uses language that really places Suzy into the reader’s head: “It’s taken five years to look for motive. This incompetent detective. This idiot of a man who called the execution random.” It is almost as if it is Suzy telling the story, not a third party. The entire book is written this way, and after a while you really forget that it’s not Suzy’s words.

Even Kim’s descriptions of other players in the novel are, it seems, through Suzy’s eyes. “Michael hates Germany. He hates almost everything, but he hates Germany more than most things”; “Dad was the best driver, never got a ticket, never got into an accident, never drove in the wrong lane”. Everyone’s traits, quirks and appearances are as Suzy would see and describe them, which helps to bring an intimacy into a third person narrative.

A key element to my own fiction is the use of Spanish; Kim opts to, at most, use a handful of Korean words throughout the story. The lack of Korean in the novel helps to bring credibility to the story since Suzy does not seem to have a culture or language to hold on to.

Not using Korean in the text, except while Suzy is interpreting, also helps the reader see that Suzy is caught in between two worlds with no identity, clinging to nothing and everything at the same time. This deliberate technique brings home the theme that Suzy is searching for herself, perhaps made evident by her choice in occupation, interpreting the language of the culture with which she is supposed to feel a connection.

Kim does a great job of using the third person point of view, flashbacks, memories and language, or lack thereof, to make Suzy as three dimensional as possible. While using memories, her present action is not affected, and the reader does not feel lost or the need to go back and re-read a page. On the contrary, the memories flow in and out, giving a little background and then returning to the current action without missing a beat.

Tuesday's TV Update: Old Shows That Rock, Vol. 1

2008-05-06T00:01:00.000-04:00

Ever since I re-signed up for Netflix, I've been reacquainting myself with some of the shows I enjoyed growing up.

Shows like The Facts of Life, Gimme A Break (which isn't very funny today), Charles in Charge and Sliders. Remember those, and how every week you anxiously awaited a new episode? Or if, like me, you caught them in reruns, how you rushed through your homework every afternoon so that you could watch TV?

Now, through the magic of Netflix, I can get through 1-2 seasons in just a few days... FAB-U-LOUS!

So, in no particular order, is my short-list of old TV shows that ROCK because they are available to rent or watch online through Netflix:

NewsRadio- Matthew and Joe totally made that show for me!

I Love Lucy- That show is STILL funny today
The Adams Family- Dark AND funny
Soul Food- Boris Kodjoe is, like, naked 75% of the time... what isn't there to enjoy?
Sliders- How many times did you wish you could travel to a parallel universe?

Quantum Leap- Oh how I prayed for Sam to go home; the ending made me cry
Designing Women- Only the Delta Burke years; after that it sucked.
The Facts of Life- after Jo came on it was the BEST
Charles in Charge- Funny even by today's standards, but only the first season with the Pembrokes
Murphy Brown- Damn they cracked me up!

*disclaimer- this is not an advertisement for Netflix... they're not paying me, although they should, but I'm not married to them. They just happen to be the people allowing me to rent their DVDs. I'm sure other online DVD rental places have these same shows, too.

Monday's Music: Merengue and Salsa To Die For

2008-05-05T00:01:00.000-04:00

I've heard some people criticize Pandora, but I have to say I love it. Mostly because it played these songs on my Good Merengue & Salsa station:

Marc Anthony- Tu Amor Me Hace Bien

Orquesta Guayacan- Oiga, Mire, Vea

Gilberto Santarosa- Conteo Regresivo

Feel free to dance your ass of while sitting at your computer. I do it all the time.

Scott Weilend! You Drug-Addicted Piece Of Shit!

2008-04-29T11:14:00.003-04:00

UGH!! I'm so mad at the following announcement I just saw on the Velvet Revolver website:

04.01.08
Velvet Revolver founding members Slash, Duff McKagan, Matt Sorum and Dave Kushner announced today that they are parting ways with singer Scott Weiland. "This band is all about its fans and its music and Scott Weiland isn't 100% committed to either," said Slash. "Among other things, his increasingly erratic on-stage behavior and personal problems have forced us to move on."

WHAAAAT THE FUUUUUCK!!!

*throws shit all over office in a full-on, rock-n-roll tantrum*

How long before they find another frontman that will fit the style of the band? First they're on the outs with Axl and I had to wait OVER TEN YEARS to see my boys on stage again. And now, when I get all comfortable and excited with the new and improved line-up, Scott can't control himself.

I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!!!!!

Janet KNOWS She Ain't Right!

2008-04-28T11:20:00.005-04:00

I love this song to death; it makes me feel very sexy and shit.

But Janet be taking her perfomances to the next freaking level!

Look at this poor boy- he's about to have a heart attack!!

Ms. Jackson- you're the one who's NASTY!!

Meanwhile, don't ever give me an occasion to perform this song myself... because the lucky recipient of my good lovin' might just end up pregnant! HA!

Bendita Indeed!!!

2008-04-25T02:09:00.002-04:00

This song couldn't be any better!! It just makes you crave love love love... perfect for spring!!

Maná w/Juan Luis Guerra - Bendita La Luz

Loosely translated, the song is about feeling blessed or lucky to have met your significant other, and thanking the cosmos (not the drink, silly, although quietly, that's how some of y'all met I'm sure...) that brought you two together.

Damn, quick! Somebody come and dance with me!!!!

Some Mayimbe For Your Friday

2008-04-11T12:59:00.002-04:00

I used this song for the title to my latest Jaded blog entry, and it made me crave Fernandito's voice like a crackhead going through withdrawal...

Listen to my boy:

Fernandito Villalona - Sonámbulo

Oh my gosh I miss my childhood so much all of a sudden! I'm going home to play records all night...

I Don't Want To Like This Song

2008-04-10T15:58:00.004-04:00

I've pretty much held onto an anti-reggaeton stance for a while now, but it's obvious that it's not a phase... it's not going anywhere... and now I accidentally sipped from the Kool-Aid:

Flex - Te Quiero

Dammit- I like this song. It's catchy and cute and I found myself humming it all day today, even danced to it on the way to the fax machine. And when I get home I'm probably gonna download it.

Side note- is it just me or are his lips mad purple in the video?? LOL!

Far Be It From Me To Promote Ignorance...

2008-04-04T22:32:00.003-04:00

But I can't lie... this movie made me laugh...

Who's Your Caddy? (2007)

Please don't think any less of me...

I Know That You Are A Psycho

2008-04-04T11:56:00.002-04:00

I'm hooked on VH1's new reality show "I Know My Child is a Star" for the simple fact that one of the mom's, Raquel AKA Rocky, is a total cracked-out head case.

I love her to bits.

video.vh1.com

After watching her rant can you honestly tell me you don't suspect this woman of SERIOUS heroin abuse? I mean look at how thin she is, and how she talks... I mean, at the very least she's got the meth face. Right? You feel me??

Ay Ay Ay, Como Me Duele: A Selena Tribute

2008-03-31T20:41:00.002-04:00

I hadn't heard of Selena until right before she was killed. I remember thinking, "I don't usually like Tejano music but this chick can sang!" And then *poof* she was gone forever.

Sadness.

Here's a little tribute:

Amor Prohibido

Si Una Vez

No Me Queda Mas

La Llamada

Bidi Bidi Bom Bom

Como La Flor

Brett Dennen, Why Do You Haunt Me So?

2008-03-31T15:28:00.002-04:00

I'm in love with his music. I can't explain it!

And, funny fact, when I first heard his music, I thought he was an old, black woman!

This is one of my favorite tunes:

Brett Dennen - Desert Sunrise

And here's my absolute favorite one ever ever!!

Brett Dennen - Blessed (not the actual video, but I wanted you to hear the song)

Feel bad after listening to that, I dare you!!!

Danish Reggae? Meet "Mandingo Warrior"

2008-03-31T00:23:00.003-04:00

So I'm writing this post on why I don't date white guys, so I wanted to see if the internets had a picture of a sexy Mandingo warrior for me to add in the post. It didn't (well except for that one...but I'm not trying to have a XXX website).

But I did come across Mandingo Warrior, the Danish reggae star. Isn't that CRAZY? He's half Gambian and half Danish and is a huge star out there in Denmark!

I gave it a listen, and I'm not really feelin' him, but I thought I'd feature him because, DAMN, Danish reggae? WORD?

This truly is an eye opening discovery...

What Pandora Is Feeding Me Today

2008-03-28T14:36:00.003-04:00

These three songs just played back to back... someone at Pandora loves me...

George Michael & Mary J. Blige - As

New Order - Regret

Lauryn Hill - Ex Factor

Internet radio ROCKS!!!

So Long, Jericho... I Loved You So

2008-03-26T21:06:00.003-04:00

Series Finale... two words I always hate to see associated with my favorite show. But, CBS has spoken, and the execs want it gone.

[insert bawling on the floor in full on tantrum smiley here]

I really should be thankful for the 7 extra episodes I got, but after I saw the finale...dammit, I want more!

Jake and Hawkins head out to Cheyenne to get the bomb, and meet up with Gray Anderson and tell him to get his weak, pasty ass back to Jericho and be a leader to the townsfolk. So he does.

Then they enlist the help of this kinda cute Asian dude, track the bomb and are ready to steal it when that SMITH GUY WHO DOUBLE CROSSED HAWKINS shoots the Asian dude and Hawkins. He does the usual bad guy schpiel before he decides to finally put a bullet in Hawkins to finish the job, but Jake shows up and kills him.

THEN he drags Hawkins into the ambulance where the bomb is hidden and Hawkins leads him to the Texas Embassy- SMOOTH AS FUCK!

The Texas governor, who doesn't trust the Cheyenne government, helps Jake and Hawkins fly a plane to San Antonio...until two fighter pilots from Cheyenne try to take Jake's plane out. Um, I'm sorry, but isn't there a freakin' BOMB in there?? But no worries... fighter pilots from TEXAS shoot down the Cheyenne planes and the bomb gets to San Antonio safe and sound.

America's 2nd Civil War has begun.

Back in Jericho, Stanley buries Bonnie, Beck finally realizes that the Cheyenne government is ASS and quits, and Gray takes down the "new" flag, replacing it with Johnston Green's "Don't Tread On Me" flag.

I was almost close to tears, not just because the show was ending, but because... well, I'm a punk and it WAS because the show was ending.

Shut up!

Aww Shit...Remember These???

2008-03-25T13:02:00.002-04:00

Don't you just love when an old jam comes on and you're automatically transported back in time?

112 - It's Over Now

Tony Terry - With You

But did you peep old boy's high-top fade?? HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

INSURRECTION: A Jericho Update

2008-03-24T09:47:00.004-04:00

Well, well, well... it looks like Jericho only received a temporary reprieve from CBS... Tuesday's episode will be the last *sniffle* and I have to keep reminding myself that television is a business- they are in the business of selling you things by attracting you with pretty, shiny shows, but if no one is watching the pretty shiny shows, well, that's when you get cancelled.

Which is a damn shame because this is a well-written show; as a writer who sometimes entertains fleeting moments of wanting to be a TV writer, I can appreciate the hard work that goes into writing dialogue and setting up plots.

*Sigh*

But oh well... here's where we're at with the Jerichoians:

Jake and the Rangers are all holed up somewhere, hiding from Beck and his men after Stanley took out Goetz. But then Jake decided to turn himself in, thinking he can be the bargaining chip that gets his friends off the hook.

Esai is having none of it. He quickly Abu Ghraib's Jake, puts him in this room, depriving him of sleep and food and water, waiting until he breaks and tells where the Rangers are hiding. Esai, baby, you're cool and all, but not cooler than Jake; he sticks it out until the Rangers break him out with a lil help from Ma Green.

Oh- and did I mention that Beck put the town on lockdown? Cut off supplies, etc, until the Rangers turned themselves in. Whatever, man... the townies were like FUCK THAT and just started trashin' and burning shit...

In other news, Hawkins is betrayed by the dude on the phone! Turns out Phone Guy is the author of the plan used to set off all the bombs, and all he wanted was the bomb that Hawkins had so he could blow up the new government that's established itself in Cheyenne. So guess what Hawkins has to do? Bring Jake with him to Cheyenne and STOP THAT BOMB!!

I'm both excited and sad for Tuesday... last line of this episode has Jake sayin to Hawkins, "When do we leave?"

Apparently, Jake, it will be next Tuesday *sniffle sniffle*.

In Memoriam: Israel "Cachao" Lopez

2008-03-23T22:38:00.003-04:00

Mambo originator and legend, Israel "Cachao" Lopez, died on Saturday, March 22nd, at the age of 89.

Sadness.

But he was an awesome musician, influenced so many, and will always be remembered.

Pour a lil liquor out and go get your mambo on in his honor...

Why I HEART 30 Rock

2008-03-22T19:26:00.003-04:00

I won't go into my usual schpiel about why this show is friggin' awesome. I'll just let the show speak for itself.

Meet Jack Donaghy, played by Alec Baldwin

Liz Lemon, played by Tina Fey

Jenna Maroney, played by Jane Krakowski

Kenneth Parcell, played by Jack McBrayer

And last but DEFINITELY not least, Tracy Jordan, played by, well, Tracy Morgan

Tune in to 30 Rock on NBC... can't tell you what night or time, 'cause I ain't got no TV... but you can do like me and go to nbc.com and check out full episodes... COMMERCIAL FREE!!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE Kaba Modern, But...

2008-03-22T17:57:00.002-04:00

JabbaWockeez KILLED THIS FUCKING SHOWDOWN!!!

That routine just made me want to take up dancing again!

And I mean, Kaba Modern was good, too:

But it was no three minute head-spin, know what I mean??

Why Do I Like R.Kelly?

2008-03-20T11:24:00.002-04:00

I want to hate this dude. He pees on underage girls, and his face is annoying.

But goddamn he can churn out some damn hits! Got me dancing in the club like I don't got no sense!!

http://youtube.com/user/RKellyTV

Even got me using Ebonics up in this bitch!

Where Can I Get This Single??

2008-03-15T20:38:00.001-04:00

I'm obsessed with this song, and this video is too cute!

Us Placers- Kanye West, Pharrell, Lupe Fiasco, Thom Yorke

That Kanye kid looks JUST like him, too!

Lost So Far...

2008-03-15T00:28:00.004-04:00

This show is giving me agita; from day 1 season one it's been about everything and nothing. Every new question answered raises thirty more questions.

How can we be in season 4 and STILL no one will tell me what the hell that black smoke monster is, and why it can't cross that one field with the magnetic whoozits.

But here's what I've gathered from the end of season 3 until now: 6 people came back from the island- Jack, Kate, Hurley, Sun, Sayid and baby Aaron, but I'm not 100% that Aaron is the 6th person. Ben made it out, too, but I'm almost sure he stayed under the radar with his return. Jin dies, but I don't know how. Michael is Ben's spy on the boat, and Walt is officially an "Other".

The "rescue" ship isn't Penny's boat...it's Penny's DAD'S boat.

Oh, what... did you think I was about to drop some spoilers and give you the heads up on the show? Negro- I'm watching the same damn program you are... they ain't sayin' SHIT!

But dammit- they got me. They got me till the end. I'm hoping for a payoff; the writers promised to end the show after 7 seasons, I think, so I'm HOPING WISHING PRAYING that they know what the fuck they are doing and where they are asking me to follow them.

Because I'll only go so far before I'm banging down JJ Abrams' door demanding my 150+ hours back!